You've gotta love the NHS. I'm sure that somewhere in there is a coherent, well-organised system, where all healthcare professionals involved in a case manage to convey a consistent opinion. Goodness knows we haven't found it yet!
Today was Husby's latest appointment at the fertility clinic. After the devastating news last Monday that we'd be unlikely ever to have children naturally, to the point of pretty much not at all, ever, we went in with our loins fully girded to have our infertility re-confirmed and to find out our next steps as a couple, whether that be some kind of fertility treatment (if that were even an opportunity they'd offer us, as it was indicated they might not have enough to work with) or counseling and further along the path of adoption (which, at this end of the week, I was quite excited about and wanted to get on with).
Well I don't know if it's the power of prayer or just utterly plumbing the depths of incomprehensible bungling and some weird form of playing both ends off against the middle, but today we were given pretty much the clean bill of fertility (pending investigations into my personal reproductive health, which was never really in question, but they're just checking).
In absolute contrast to all we've been told since about September, not only does the fertility guy think that Husby should be able to take this hormone long-term in some capacity, but that his count is on the low side, but within normal conception parameters (as long as you don't ask the WHO - this is an experience-based judgement) and should improve anyway with treatment, and that we may not even require any fertility treatment because all might be well!
If I wasn's so confused, I'd be happy, and if I wasn't so happy I'd be MAD!
I'm not sure 'emotional rollercoaster' even begins to cover the last few months. Not. Even.
I feel like it's been an emotional Wimbledon final and we've been the tennis balls the players are smashing back and forth with great vigour.
I mean, really, it's fantastic news but utterly unbelievable, seeing as all has been doom and gloom for so long, with the clouds rapidly gathering to rain on our parade. I still don't quite fully believe it - I really want to, but it's seemed for so long like we're living in a Greek tragedy where people keep rushing in with bad news, I'm kinda waiting for the other shoe to drop.
Not to mention, Thank God!
And what the %&$?
I think I'll pay a visit to confused.com and ask them what the hell just happened there.
We will still adopt, though, but hopefully it'll be back in our original expectation (alongside biological child(ren)) rather than as an alternative. Yay for that, at least. Our constant remains a constant.